[Just because I can, this has been posted from 36,000 feet, enroute to L.A. Suck it, it’s a cheap thrill, I’m entitled.]

It takes massive Maybach-sized balls to park your over-the-top, overpriced S-Class deliberately next to a hydrant when you’ve got gobs of parking well clear of it.

This fucking guy is somethin’ else. Not only did he bogart the three-seater row with his stupid guitar, he played it the entire fucking train ride. When the girl next to him came aboard and sat down next to this self-appointed minstrel of the rails, he had the fucking nerve to lean over to her and ask if she had any requests! The fucking cheek. When she politely declined (far too polite, if you ask me – I’d have responded with a rather terse, “Do fuck off!”), he simply retreated and continued plucking away with his worst rendition of some awful shit like Dave Matthews Band or something equally horrible. What an asshole.

This fucking guy with the monkey tail beard, whomever he is. I believe this makes his right ear a monkey’s asshole.